Christmas Portrait #1

Hi my little fagolahs! It's ya Aunt Frannie Babies!

What a day it has been!

Ya Uncle Frank surprised me at brunch today with this old photograph! I was in the middle of a conversation with Irene McClusky about how wonderful the new Denture Cream is, and Uncle Frank slid this in the middle of the table for everyone to see!

Oh my gawd! Yeah!

This picture was taken back in 1964 and is a Christmas Portrait that Mother forced me to take with my shrew of a younger sister. That's right.....you finally have a picture of my ex sibling Sheri'.

You may notice the uncomfortable look on my face. That's because just before Mother said "cheese", Sheri found out Irene McClusky's brother Bobby had asked me out to the Friar's Christmas Gala instead of her. Bobby had done quite well for himself in the novelty business, selling fake teeth but of course I had no interest in him whatsoever as I was in love with ya Uncle Frank. Of course I told Sheri' I was going to accept Bobby's invitation, thus denying her the joy of attending the party, but that was only because she stole the bottle of vodka I hid in my bedroom. She sulked for days but we had a wonderful time!

Family memories are wonderful aren't they?

I hope you're having a wonderful week getting ready for the big hollyday! Uncle Frank and I are getting ready to play twister in the Shady Pines Retirement Villa Rec Room.

Merry Christmas!

(send help!)

Maureen, Anita & The Pearl Necklace

Hi babeees! It's ya Aunt Frannie!

I was looking for a complete set of gin rummy cards this morning for my weekly game with Ethel, Zada and Clara, and look what I ran across!

It was between my copy of Leaves Of Grass and the bottle of gin leftover from last friday.

I KNOW! Another photograph of ya Aunt Francine! Yeah!

Oh the memories this brings back.

Uncle Frank took this back in march of 1962 while we were discussing the dinner we had just had with Maureen Stapleton and her 'gal pal' Phyllis Schafley.

Oh my we had a good time that night! Maureen and Phyllis were always so much fun when we got together, and they always had the best dish on everybody! I remember they described a run in with that horrible Anita Bryant while trolling one evening at the bar on 5th called the Pearl Necklace.

Apparently Maureen walked in on Miss Florida Orange Juice herself entering a stall in the ladies room with an especially rough looking Dyke from one of the Boroughs in Jersey. Was she nervous! Oh MY we had a good laugh!.....yeah.

Anyway, I thought you might like to see Aunt Franny from way back, when she was the cat's meow. Be good my little fagolahs!

Bye! MUAH!

(send help)

Wheeeeee!

Hi my lil gay babies! It's ya Aunt Frannie!!!!

June Allison emailed me this photo from yesterdays Wii bowling session in the rec room.

Every friday the staff at Shady Pines Retirement Villa corrall us for 'activities', and this week it was playing Wii!

When they first mentioned it we thought they wanted a urine sample, but it turned out it was all fun and games. Not that urine can't be fun, but you know what I mean. I do not judge.

Sam Berg (seated) pouted the entire time because I beat his score. He's really a very sweet man even though he looks grumpy. He was injured on his way to Best Buy while crossing the street and his wrist has never been the same. Yeah..., poor dear.

Anyway my little fagolahs..... I thought you might like to see ya Aunt Francine kickin some senior citizen butt!

Bye!!!
(send help)

Summer Picnic

Hi Babeees! It's ya Aunt Frannie honies!

I wanted to share something I received in the mail today!

Shirley, a second cousin of mine from Custer South Dakota
sent this picture of two lovely ladies ready for a summer pick in ic.

Do you recognize one of them?

That's right! It's ya Aunt Francine! Oh my I had forgotten all about this picture! Yeaaahhhh.

It was taken in June of 1952 during ya Aunt Frannies brief foray into the world of modeling! This was my verrrry first job in front of the camera, and it was for McCalls Summer fashion, pattern # 2576. I just love the prints and the umbrellas! My modeling partner was very young Sharon Stone.....and she was a stone cold you know what too. Yeahhh. She was very snotty. Most tall girls usually are.

Anyway..........

Speaking of "umbrellas" ellas ellas. If that smartmouth Chris Brown had ever started anything with ya Aunt Frannie, he would've found that floral umbrella protruding from one of his lower orafices!

That's all for now babeees! Hope you enjoyed the pic!

(send help)

Love
Aunt Frannie

Happy Thanksgiving From Ya Aunt Frannie

Happy Thanksgivn my little fagolahs! It's ya Aunt Frannie babies!

I hope you are all having the best holiday possible and that whether you spend it with family, friends, or that special love you met on the hardware aisle at Home Depot, you know that you are loved.

Times may be hard this year, but they could always be worse....and I should know. I've lived through two world wars, the great depression and three false pregnancy scares when I was in college, so trust me on this. Yeah.

Uncle Frank is trying to get me to hurry up and get ready. The staff here at Shady Hills Retirement Villa is forcing us to attend their production of "Bye Bye Byrdie"....I think that's code for no turkey dinner.

Send Help!

We love you, have a great holiday! Bye!

Are You Kidding Me?

Lunch today: Fish sticks, fries, ketchup, chocolate milk and an apple.

Are you kidding me?

Half the people here don't have teeth and they give us AN APPLE??????

Uncle Frank got so upset he threw his at the Retirement Home Director. Luckily, Ed (the new guy with Tourettes) had an outburst and they blamed him instead.

I'm using my apple to make a potpourri.

Send help.

(and a gift card to Denny's please)

Giddy, Drunk & Gay

Hi Babees! It's ya Aunt Frannie honeees!

It's a brisk afternoon in Sunny Florida and your Uncle Frank and I have been going through a trunk of keepsakes sent by my ex sister Sherine.

You know your Aunt Frannie doesn't like to talk bad about anybody....except Michigan, so I won't bore you with all the details of why Sherine is my "ex" sibling.

However, it was very nice of her to send along some of the items from Mother's estate sale.

Inside I found a treasure! Yeaaaah!

The above photograph was taken June 23rd, 1957 after an especially scandalous evening out with Hetti Lamar, Bill Winchester, his 'cousin' Irene Malberg and on the far right do you know who that is my little fagolah??

That's right! It's ya Aunt Francine, all dolled up!! Oh my, I look so young don't I?

Hetti, Billy, Irene and your Uncle Frank & I were all having such a good time! We were giddy, drunk and gay. Wait...I don't mean gay like my little homo-lovelys, I mean 'gay' as in we were magically happy....so maybe that is like the 'gay' of today. I don't know. I do wish Uncle Frank could have been in the picture, but someone had to hold the kodak because they didn't have timers in those days. We had just been to the Rialto Movie Theatre in Lansing where we watched the initial screening of Witness For the Prosecution starring Leonard Vole, Marlene Dietrich and the dreamy Tyrone Power! Oh such fun we had!

Well anyway, I hope you enjoyed seeing your Aunt Francine during her younger days, and if my "EX" sister Sherine happens to be reading this blog, I want to thank her for the trunk, and remind her that I was always Mother's favorite!

Bye Babeeesss!!!! MUAH!